Tuesday, September 23, 2014
Our Adoption Journey
Our journey begins with a desire. I had always wanted boys, all boys. I always thought I would make an excellent boy mom. But, God had other plans by entrusting us with 4 daughters. I wouldn't change a thing. Though life gets so tough with these 4 at times, I know God gave me these 4 to develop my character as well as me training them.
Still, I would always ask God why He never gave me a boy when He knew that was a great desire. I never received an answer to this question. I am always reminded that God IS God and I am not!!! His ways are not my ways.
Lets zip forward now from my deep desires and questions towards God to a year and a half ago. A family member just off-the-cuff mentioned to me in a phone conversation that "Little Man" was taken from his mother. She had left him unattended for a few days to go on a drug binge. My heart, as you can imagine sank. He was just 1 at the time. His mother, you see, is my cousin. Making Little man my 2nd cousin. As my relative was telling me the circumstances I felt in my heart a leap for joy, I needed to tell hubby all of this right away, but, wait, will he feel the same way, I mean our life is set with the 4 girls, adding a 1 year old boy would be like throwing a monkey wrench into our family. I mean, here hubby was just talking about how wonderful it was not to call on a babysitter, or just go when ever. So, I wasn't sure just how hubby would respond.
I chose to tell him just matter-of-fact way. And he jumped at the news that if Little Man needed a home, we would be available. Hubby was more excited than I. We knew we needed to talk with the girls first, I mean adding Little Man would change their lives as well. All 4 girls loved the idea. So we prayed on this and I gave family member a call back and asked for them to get us all info needed to get this going.
This same family member came to see us shortly after this phone call took place, they brought with them the info needed. As they were in communication with the CPS office handling the case. Family member was elated, very elated that we have chosen to do this.
Let me say its been a long process. The first CPS agent was not at all friendly nor easy to work with, she only took two of my calls in the 9 months she was on the case. The second, and last call with this agent left us discouraged, to say the least. It was just before Christmas 2013, I called to find out where we were in the process, Agent told me she had no info for me and if I wanted to know anything, I needed to talk to Little Mans' mama, and hung up.
We had already gathered many things for Little Man, its amazing how God works in these times. Everything hubby and I had hoped for, for Little Man we got either free or at a very low cost. I really want his room to be Lightening McQueen, I have always loved Disney's Cars movie. We located a bed, and bedding that is so adorable. Hubby and I are both tall, so we talked about how cool it would be to get a stroller that the handles that extend, and guess what, ha, we went to a garage sale where this stroller was new, and it had extended handles. After explaining to the woman we were adopting she gave, GAVE it to us, because she respected the fact we were doing this. We have several clothes, shoes, and toys found for Little Man. But after the news from this agent, I just put it all out of sight.
January 2014 came along, Hubby asked me about Little Man, he wondered if it was even gonna happen. He wanted to know if we should just donate the stuff we had gathered for Little Man. I asked him to give me a day to think about it. The next day, I told him after praying to God, I was not ready to give up nor donate the stuff, I just didn't feel that chapter of our life was finished.
Now zip to March 2014, I decided to call that same CPS agent that so rudely cut me off and out of Little Mans life. I got a hold of that agents assistant, of whom I had left countless messages for the agent she assisted. She went on to explain she recognized my name and info and that she was now the lead on Little Mans case, the old agent was let go. She thanked me for calling back and proceeded to explain that our interest was a new lead in Little Mans case, that until now, no one else came forward for him. She got the ball rolling for the Interstate Adoption process, which in our case is called "Relative Placement." We are still working on this, all back ground checks, financials, finger-printing, etc have taken place and reviewed. We are currently waiting on the home-study, and we are praying that Little Man is placed in our home before the Winter sets in.
For the protection of Little Man at this point and family members, I am not revealing those details. Little Mans' mama is very young and very hot-tempered, I know because she is a direct family member. Also, for the protection of Little Man it has not been revealed to family directly involved with him and CPS that my family has petitioned for him.